The head-shot that bagged a wedding

Prison rules pickleball. How speed can hurt your game.

March 12, 2025

Picture this: In just three days, you and your fiancé will be walking down the aisle. The venue is ready, guests are boarding flights, reality is starting to kick in. This is it.

And then, at your weekly casual rec game, hubby-to-be takes a pickleball to the face.

If there’s one thing Final Destination taught us, it’s that freak accidents don’t care about your big day.

The true, cautionary tale concludes below.

In This Issue:

💒 The head-shot that bagged a wedding
💸 Pickleball’s first $2,500 paddle
🍗 How to avoid the dreaded ‘chicken wing’

On with the show.

Our Picks ☝️

🧢 More Protein: Attack of the Pickleball Bros

A quick-spreading species, the pickleball bro is a late-20s, early-to-mid 30-something man who believes a 5.0 DUPR rating is a personality trait. And he’s coming to an open play near you. One South Florida rec player recounts her run-ins with this new invasive species.

💦 Hold Up: Is Pickleball a Physically ‘Moderate’ Sport?

The beauty of a sport like pickleball going mainstream is it starts getting mainstream media coverage. The downside? That it can lead to claims like this one from Men’s Health, regarding its level of difficulty: “Physically moderate, mentally moderate.” We beg your pardon? Come at us, bro!

🔄 Making Moves: More Player Trades for MLP

The second MLP trade window has seen its second set of transactions. In trade #1, the Bay Area Breakers acquired Danna Funaro while the NY Hustlers scored Lingwei Kong (plus cash). Trade #2 saw Juan Benitez head to the California Black Bears and the NY Hustlers secure Stephen Madonia (plus cash).

🐦‍⬛ Snowbirds, Rejoice! Pickleball Takes Over Florida Pier

Two temporary courts are spotted on the new pier in downtown St. Petersburg, FL. The two-month attraction promotes a brand-new downtown pickleball facility, St. Pete Atheltic, set to open this summer. Your winter workout can either be shoveling snow… or playing pickleball with a sea breeze and ocean backdrop. Your call.

Avoid the Dreaded ‘Chicken Wing’

What if we told you the key to faster hand speed, especially at the kitchen line, is actually slowing down?

As the sport’s speed and intensity increases, it may feel like the only way to keep pace is to anticipate your opponent’s next shot to give your hands a bit of a head start.

But this can actually hurt you. If you react to a shot too early, you end up committing to a movement that can leave you stuck or out of position when the ball actually comes your way.

At the kitchen line, this often means shading to your trusty backhand. You might not even know you’re doing it. But it’s likely why you get caught in the dreaded “chicken wing” position so often: you zigged, your opponent zagged.

Instead, try this: Trust your positioning, stay balanced and react to the shot that comes, not the shot you think is going to come.

Your hands are quicker than you think. Trust them.

Selkirk's Basically Giving Away Free Money

Okay, pay attention, because this is basically free pickleball money: Selkirk's got a Bonus Bucks program and it's kinda awesome.

Spend $50 at Selkirk, get $5 Bonus Bucks. Spend $100, get $10. You get the idea. It's like getting paid to shop for pickleball gear... almost.

Bonus Bucks activate after 45 days (gotta be patient, folks), but then BAM – discounted paddles, apparel, whatever your heart desires on your next Selkirk haul.

🤔 Newsletter getting clipped? Click ‘view entire message’ or click here to read online

The Eye-Shot That Ruined an ‘I Do’

Meeting your forever partner can be challenging enough. But as many of you know, planning the next inevitable life stage — wedded bliss — can be an all-consuming test of your commitment.

For one reddit user, the big day was just three days away. So her and her fiancé decided to do what they do every Friday evening: enjoy a few games of casual pickleball.

Everything was fine until a fluke shot made direct contact with his eye.

“An ER visit turned into an optometry visit into an ophthalmology visit into a cornea specialist visit,” the tale goes. “My fiancé was in too much pain, had a nasty shiner, and literally could not open their eyes so we made the last minute decision to cancel the wedding.”

The two did end up getting married in a much smaller ceremony in their apartment, but let this be a lesson to us all: Love may be blind, but that doesn’t mean you have to be. Wear. The. Glasses.

Want to Play at The Dink MiLP 2025 National Championships?

See those ladies celebrating? They're having a blast on The Dink MiLP circuit, chasing something BIG: a trip to The Dink MiLP 2025 National Championships. And YOU could be too.

The Dink Minor League Pickleball offers TWO ways to get to Nationals: win a Dream Ticket at State Championships or Regional Showdowns, or rack up points on the National Leaderboard at local MiLP events. Your choice!

And don't forget the prize purse is now $100,000 across ALL divisions. So, Nationals dreams and potential cash winnings? The Dink MiLP is leveling up the amateur game.

Prison Rules Pickleball

We’ve told you before—pickleball is spreading everywhere, including prisons across the country. And honestly? That’s a great thing. It gives inmates something productive to do, teaches patience, strategy, and maybe even a little humility. Speaking of humility …

Scott Peterson, the convicted murderer serving life at Mule Creek State Prison, learned a hard lesson on the court—literally. During a pickleball game, he allegedly fired a shot straight at another inmate, which resulted in a hands battle of the traditional kind. No hospital trip needed, but let’s just say he won’t be testing the waters with body shots again anytime soon.

Pickleball’s First $2,500 Paddle

How can you tell if a paddle is delaminated? Just ask Travis Rettenmaier. He challenged three paddles in one match resulting in the year’s first forfeit due to a paddle exceeding legal limits.

He shares the fiery exchange that took place on court on a new PicklePod. Plus we hear from the JOOLA's Chief Experience Officer, Gordon Kaye, on how the paddle manufacturer is approaching paddle regulation.

Finally, we break down the MLP Auction Draft results and officially declare 2025 a Hot Girl Summer. Catch the new episode here.

Headlines & Quick Hits

Highlights

Missed a recent issue? We've got you covered

Correction: In our last issue, we stated that Waters and Parenteau won 10 straight PPA women’s doubles golds against Bright and Rohrabacher. We meant 10 events where both teams competed. (Waters/Parenteau skipped February’s Australia Open.)

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